A Wet Hot American Post-Kids Friday Night

Ok, so it’s 7:22pm on a Friday night. Let me guess. You and your spouse are finishing up bedtime with the kids and fantasizing. Not of a romantic dinner out and hours of nookie after. No, no, no, the post-kids Friday night fantasy goes a little differently. You’re anxiously waiting to hear the doorbell because it means the sushi has arrived, you can almost taste the cheap Trader Joe’s red wine on your lips, and oooooh so soon you will be hearing the most exciting sound...the opening credits of [fill in whatever series you and your hubs are currently obsessed with]. Yes, honey, I’ll go get the soy sauce and you pour the drinks. You’ll figure out where we left off (because one of you ALWAYS falls asleep in the middle of an episode), while I change into my sexiest sweatpants. I understand that communicating and connecting with each other is very important in a marriage but, lezbehonest, sometimes you just need to be able to sit silently next to the person you love, eat your damn sushi, and get in touch with your inner Heisenberg. And, why not?

It Reinforces Your Vows.

On your wedding day, you likely vowed to be true and faithful to your spouse. That shit doesn’t just apply to physical cheating. If you’re watching episodes of a show you watch together behind your spouse’s back, that’s a friggin' betrayal. And if it’s the series finale of the show, well, you should probably call a lawyer, because you deserve to be left. Just kidding. Well, not really.

 It Teaches You To Be Patient.

Sometimes life and marriage are about playing the long game. If you and your spouse stuck through Lost until the end, you can get through anything together.

It Makes You A Better Person.

Friday Night Lights will make you a better wife and make your husband a better husband. Forget couples counseling -- watching 5 seasons of Coach T and Mrs. T work through the challenges that wayward West Texas teens, a crushing pressure to win and an alien baby daughter throw their way, all while never, ever wavering on their love and respect for each other will have you reflecting on your relationship in a whole new way. Clear eyes, full hearts. Seriously.

 It Reminds You Of What’s Really Important.

The magazines say the secret to a good marriage is having a regular date night, communicating, not going to bed mad, blah blah blah. But I sort of think that the secret to marriage is liking your spouse enough to just be with them. No frills, no fancy restaurants, no distractions of friends. Just being perfectly content sitting in a room, in comfy pjs, debating whether lesbians should really be placed in female prisons or frantically theorizing about whether John Snow is actually dead (he’s not, is he???). My hubs and I have been together a million years so we were on the binge-watching train well before having kids, and to this day some of our favorite memories include watching 17 episodes of Lost in a row while only breaking to go buy chicken nuggets and ice cream, and buying bootlegged copies of seasons 2/3 of Mad Men on a street in Thailand during our honeymoon. Sure, I also appreciate fancy spas and nice restaurants, but ultimately, before and after kids, I just enjoy being in the same room as him. Especially if it includes sushi and wine.